Okay
by paperplanet
Summary: And she thought—okay, maybe this is not so bad after all.


Disclaimer: Do not own YJ.

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**Okay.**

"'**Okay**' (also spelled '**OK**', '**O.K'**) is a colloquial English word denoting approval, acceptance, agreement, assent, or acknowledgment." – wikipedia.

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And she thought—_okay, maybe this is not so bad after all._

* * *

Life is a series of ups and downs. She knew that was a lie as easily as she recognized the back of her hand. Like—ups and downs? Really? So can anyone tell her right here, right now, the ups of her life?

She was convinced she would be welcomed by silence, and you have to admit that she's not entirely wrong.

.

_Her smile was alive and her red hair shone underneath the bright light of the kitchen. She was saying something and Artemis wasn't listening but she nodded and hummed to show that she did. M'Gann laughed happily and the sound sent tingles in the archer's stomach because dammit—she sounded so happy and M'Gann was her friend and she actually felt happy that her friend was joyful._

"_I'm really glad you and Wally are finally together!"_

"_Wha—?"_

_.  
_

_Robin (or she should say, Dick) flipped in mid-air and attempted a kick that grazed her side. She tried to catch his leg but he smirked and did this graceful movement reserved for Dick Grayson only. How he managed to land so gracefully on one hand, Artemis did not bother to ask. She stopped to take a breath and glared at him._

"_One of these days, I promise I'll kick your ass," she said._

_His smirk widened and he mocked a bow. "I'll wait for it."_

_.  
_

_Conner stared at her._

_She stared back._

"_So—uh, how's life?" She attempted lamely._

"_Fine. How about yours?"_

"_Uh—okay, I guess."_

"_Okay."_

_And then they watched this horrid tv series that M'Gann insisted to see and they shared a secret look behind the red head's back because that's probably the only thing that kept them sane for hours._

.

"_So— how do you do these kind of things, exactly?"_

_Kaldur smiled and his eyes twinkled with amusement. "Just let the wave guide you, it's not necessarily difficult."_

_Right. Of course. Said the water-guy._

_Because of all the things she couldn't do, surfing just had to be her worst talent._

_(she knew she heard him laughing when she fell and almost drowned for the hundreth time but how he managed to be patient with her—she never knew.)_

.

"_Fine," he breathes. His green eyes stared into hers and she wanted to avert her eyes because she suddenly felt flustered and awkward—she didn't though, and maybe her gaze wavered just a bit but she couldn't be sure when she was so busy to control her breathing. "I understand that you want some time alone and everything—maybe I'm stupid because I know you but I don't know you and yet..."_

_He trailed off, and he leaned backward slightly to give her some space to breathe (because she was pressed against the wall the second she left her room, curse herself for letting her guard down). "—I like you, Artemis Crock. I'm sorry for myself, but I like you."_

_Her heart seemed to be doing a little dance and yet she managed to scowl and choked out a reply. "Are you done, Bay-watch? Because I have things to do."_

_He shrugged. "May I accompany you then, dear goddess?"_

_And it was so cheesy and infuriating so she smacked his head and hoped he did not notice the redness of her cheeks. "Shut up, Wallman."_

_He grinned as if he had expected her response, and perhaps he really did. "Lead the way, beautiful."_

.

So when she broke Dick's (it's Dick in her mind now, never Robin) ribs with a particularly hard kick that had slammed the younger boy to the hard stone wall, she didn't flinch.

That's why her eyes didn't water when she lit a fire around M'Gann who was shouting and screaming and pleading—_Artemis! Don't do this!_

It's the reason why holding a kryptonite near a nearly unconscious Conner didn't make her hands tremble.

It's why she could easily place Kaldur in a room without water and knocked the older boy's head onto the creaking floor.

(she knew they were holding back and that's why she was still alive but no, she wasn't holding back.)

And that's definitely why stabbing him with a knife while his green eyes were staring into hers didn't make her heart ache, head dizzy, and legs weak because damn it hurt so bad—and she certainly didn't wish that the pain was physical because then it would heal and would left nothing but a huge permanent scar.

But he smiled—and at times like this she knew why she was so in love with him.

_I'm sorry_ was slipped out of her lips but his gaze was steady and his smile was solemn.

"You do what you have to do to survive, beautiful. And I don't approve this, Arty. But whatever."

He blew out a long breath and touched the silver blade that was still embedded in his chest. If he was in pain, she didn't know. "I'll keep this as a souvenir."

And she wanted to cry and undo those things she did and begged forgiveness, really. But instead, she turned and walked away.

"Goodbye, Wally."

"See you, Artemis."

He never did believe in the phrase goodbye. There's nothing good in it, after all.

.

Her father praised her and clapped her back—and she should be happy. Isn't this what she had always wanted?

He was so proud and had taken her to his friends, bragging her as a daughter he had always wanted. The perfect daughter that had earned the trust from the Justice League easily and betrayed them almost as easily—and he bet, he said, that they had never seen it coming.

Isn't that true, he asked her and she would nod and smile.

_Yes, dad._

.

"_Why do you put so much trust in me?"_

_He stopped and abandoned the potato chips for a second before answering, "Because."_

_She pursed her lips and lifted her head from his shoulder to get a better look at his confused face. "That's not a good reason."_

_He raised an eyebrow and put the snacks down. "You don't need a reason to trust someone, beautiful. You just do."_

_And she had replied, firmly. "I'll do what I have to do to survive."_

_He chuckled. "I know."_

"_But you...trust me anyway?"_

"_Of course. Why not?"_

"_Thanks."_

"_Okay, now can I get a kiss?"_

.

She wasn't lonely. Perhaps she was alone, but she wasn't lonely.

She had Chesire and her dad, also her mum even though she hadn't talked to her since the betrayal thingy (which was a year ago) but she assured herself that this twisting sensation in her gut wasn't loneliness. Loneliness was a weakness, and she had gotten rid of them a year ago. So she walked alone and slept alone—

And she didn't have any friends. No one she could talk to, no one that would listen to her and do unimportant things because that's the kind of things they do—but she had her dysfunctional family that would throw her willingly into the arms of the Grimm reaper if they thought it could save their life—And she thought—_okay, maybe this is not so bad after all._

_/She wondered why she couldn't stop lying to herself./_

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A/N: Probably shouldn't have written this on school night—anyways, let me know what you think! This could be a two or three shot. Thanks. Oh and yeah, sorry for the grammar mistakes and everything else.


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